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Apr. 19th, 2023 07:44 pm
feintofhart: ([ war phase ] having a think)
[personal profile] feintofhart
[ prettification to come! ]

Date: 2024-10-13 12:02 pm (UTC)
entreats: (distorted truth; to recover everything)
From: [personal profile] entreats
[ She doesn't look at him.

Her gaze drops. ]


My life is worth less than dirt.

[ Granted, even if it wasn't, it's very likely that she would still have given his life more weight than her own. He really is that important to her. But the fact that she thinks so little of her own life - due to all the influences of other people on that very same perception of her life - makes it even easier to elevate the importance of his life above her own.

At least she doesn't ignore his question though. After slowly letting out a tired breath, she shakes her head, still not raising her gaze. ]


I haven't here. [ Her voice is a little more quiet now. ] .. you've experienced it. Even if you die here, you just come back. It'd be pointless.

[ There's a pause after the words, and they feel a certain way to Ange that doesn't feel Great. She can't pinpoint exactly why at first, but then she slowly realizes it, especially in the light of what had just happened to Claude.

It'd be pointless to her, yes. But in this case, when it concerns Claude's case instead-- ]


I'm glad you're back though. [ It's the one good thing about the way coming back to life works here. At least it brought him back to her. ] I don't know what I would've done if you hadn't come back.

Date: 2024-10-23 08:07 pm (UTC)
entreats: (and we are so fragile)
From: [personal profile] entreats
[ Ange looks like she isn't sure what to say. At least she is actually looking at him again, but it makes it even more clear that the look in her eyes is a little helpless. As if she doesn't have an answer to that question that she can lay out so clearly - because this stuff has always lived in her head, not coming out of there in words spoken to someone else.

It doesn't feel fair to focus so much on her when he's the one who died and came back to life - and clearly isn't dealing with it in a great way - but at the same time that fact makes her unable to not answer his question. Isn't this the least she owes him, actually answering what he's asking her? ]


I mean.. You're some big ruler. You're going to change the world.

[ Sure, it's something Claude has only said, but she has enough faith in him and his abilities to believe that he can actually do it. That he can live up to all the dreams he has.

It's the easiest way to describe why her life is worth so little. She can't think of any other way to do it other than this comparison, other than-- ]


Meanwhile, I'm just.. [ ... ] .. all I can do is expose what actually happened to my family and then.. and then there will be nothing left. I wasn't put into this world with any sort of purpose. If I disappeared, no one would care.

[ .. except..

Except there's what Claude is saying here. Right now. It makes it harder to say those words, even though Ange knows they are 100% true when it comes to her world. ]


No one's told me that before. That they-- they wouldn't know what to do if I'd die. [ Judging by the way she says it, she even has a hard time wrapping her head around the idea, though she's trying - and fumbling. ] You really mean that..?
Edited Date: 2024-10-23 08:09 pm (UTC)

Date: 2024-11-03 11:59 am (UTC)
entreats: (the pictures that she sees)
From: [personal profile] entreats
... I-- I don't know how to do that.

[ It's not a rejection of what he's saying. Her tone isn't firm enough for it. Compared to how he raised his voice a moment ago, Ange's own voice is so quiet - like it's a vulnerable admission, something she wouldn't just tell anyone.

But considering what Claude is saying, she has to tell him. She has to confess this. That she doesn't know how to do that - just.. living.

It makes something in her gaze look desperate as she stares at him, unsure what to say here, other than this. She's never known how to live. The only reason she's still living now, past her due date, is because she had one last thing to do. Is that really living? She more often feels like a zombie shambling through life.

Ange is quiet for a few moments after it, then she shakes her head. ]


Sorry, I shouldn't be saying this. I mean-- Not right now. You have to rest first. [ God, he just literally came back from the dead. ]

Date: 2024-11-23 12:27 pm (UTC)
entreats: (hit me with lightning)
From: [personal profile] entreats
[ She slowly raises her gaze to actually look at him.

There's something hesitant about it. The girl still looks awkward, like confessing all of this takes a lot out of her - and the fact she was already so emotionally exhausted because of her feelings over his death sure don't really help with that either. Still, it does seem like something about his words at least coax enough out of the girl to make her look over at him.

Silently, first, for a moment. Maybe she's thinking about everything he's saying. Especially when Ange isn't sure what these words mean. Claude clearly is affected by his death - who wouldn't be, if you aren't used to the kind of crap that Ange is? - and yet he's saying he's glad she told him this. Even though this feels like the worst possible moment of it.

If it wasn't for the fact that she doesn't think Claude would practice empty flattery when something in his eyes looks so tired, she might imagine he was lying to her.

But if he isn't-- what then? What does that make this? Is Claude just truly that nice, that selfless? For her?

...

She'll try to drag him over towards a bed in a moment, she tells herself. She has to make sure Claude rests, especially when she isn't sure a guy who would stop to listen to all of this right after dying would make sure he gets said necessary rest.

But right now, just for a moment, she needs to hear-- ]


You can help..?

[ It doesn't feel like anyone can. It's never felt that way. Ange doesn't even know how to express this endlessly hopeless feeling to anyone else. It feels impossible to understand for someone who hasn't been through it themselves-- so how is anyone meant to help with that? If Ange can't get out of that pit herself, how could someone else help her?

But..

Is it so strange to have just a little bit of hope when he's the one telling her it? ]

Date: 2024-12-07 01:46 pm (UTC)
entreats: (if the things invisible to my eyes)
From: [personal profile] entreats
[ It really is the biggest danger in this place...

Still, right now the main thing Ange is thinking about is how strange all of this is. It's only been in this place that she's been introduced to the concept of people wanting to help her - well, without getting hired for it, anyway. But what Claude is doing is going even beyond that. He's not offering to help her with a simple thing, to start with. And he's offering her it despite the fact that he just went through hell and back.

She takes the hand and shakes it, but the thoughts keep lingering in her mind, and..

It makes her release the hand after a moment, just to go in for another hug. A more brief one this time. She may cling to him intensely, but it's only for a moment, as if Ange really had to get that one out. When she lets go of him, her face is finally mostly free of tears, but she does look like she's blushing a little bit, not fully sure of how to handle herself in this moment, unlike the usual. ]


Thanks. [ Ange says, once she's let go. ] If there's anything I can help you with too at some point, you should let me know.

[ She glances back over her shoulder at the wyvern, and then over to Claude again. ]

Mroe than just watching her while you're gone, I mean. [ Though, let's be real. Ange was the one being babysat by the wyvern, not the other way around. ]

Date: 2024-12-23 07:19 pm (UTC)
entreats: (so my darling; give me your absence)
From: [personal profile] entreats
.. forget the sit down. You should probably just nap.

[ There's no sharpness to her words at all, even when Ange is saying stuff that's a little bit more like the things she would usually say - if neither of them had been through the wringer in their own way over the past week. If they didn't have such a massively embarrassing emotional display.

It's likely the fault of all of those things that her tone is more meek now as she speaks.

Still - she doesn't seem to reject his request, already stepping closer in the direction of the door before she stops to look back at him. ]


It should be safe to do that now. Or-- You know, whatever goes for 'safe' in this place on a normal day.

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